Status report

It's forty degrees and overcast today. My bedroom is something of a disaster zone - I got my four boxes of stuff that I shipped home (in addition to the two suitcases) and I'm in the middle of unpacking all that. Out side of my window, between the pale-gray of the neighbors roof and turquoise of my walls, a few barren tree limbs blow in the wind. They're not dead and I know that in a few months they'll be lush and green. For now, though, a few scraggly and shriveled seeds cling to the sekeletal branches.

I have no idea what the weather is like right now in Santa Fe - weather.com tells me it's 43, feels like it's 37, and cloudy. Weather reports are occasionally misleading at 7000 feet, though, and the weather in Santa Fe proper may be rather different from the weather up on the mountain at school.

I desperately miss my friends from school. At some point in the past year and a half the friends I had in high school were nearly all replaced by friends from college. With one exception, those high school friends I've held onto are away themselves now, at their respective schools. The effect, regardless of how much of it is in my mind, is that I feel isolated. It's vastly different from the "no one likes me and I'm a freak" feeling that plagued me in high school, but simply that circumstances have forced me away from the vast majority of my friends.

I feel unemployed. That's because I am.

I feel like I'm no longer a student, because I'm not. For the first time I can remember I'm not enrolled somewhere full-time, and I'm still trying to work out how I feel about that. Right now I don't think I like it, but that could be related to the unemployment as well. I'm unproductive.

Looking out the window and seeing mountains, as I could in Santa Fe, was unspeakably nice.