As a soldier, all my medical care is provided by the Army. I don't have health insurance so much as the understanding that in most situations the Army will provide whatever care I need - but if they can't, they'll send me to civilians who can, and the Army will pay the tab.
Unless I'm raped and don't want to carry and birth the child of my rapist; in that case the Army doesn't give a fuck about me. Civilian government workers? Yeah, we'll cover that. Federal prisoners? Sure. Service members? Nah, they can just go ahead and suck it up, because fuck them, right?
My favorite Texas governor has a new campaign ad! I keep trying to ignore it and pretend it doesn't exist but it's like they said in Inception - once an idea is in your head it's awfully hard to get rid of it. Perry's latest oeuvre is a thirty-second spot entitled "Strong", which doesn't even start off crazy and go downhill; it just sort of spawned into existence at the bottom of the Great Right Swamp of Idiocy and thrashed around in the mud a bit. Let's take a look:
Okay. First of all, before you start considering killing yourself after watching this, note that as of right now it's got 17,732 'likes' and 597,744 'dislikes'. It also, in my opinion, constitutes hate speech, which means you can report it as offensive to YouTube. Now let's break it down piece by piece.
1. Rick Perry is not ashamed to be a Christian. This is outstanding! This is America, where we pride ourselves on our religious freedom and tolerance. Freedom of religion is explicitly spelled out in the Constitution and no one should ever be made to feel uncomfortable when it comes to professing a particular faith. And he's right - you certainly don't need to regularly attend a Christian church to see that there's something wrong with this country...
2. "...when gays can serve openly in the military." I will freely grant that Gov. Perry is wholly entitled to think that gay people are wrong/creepy/sinners/etc. However, I personally don't see what is wrong with allowing fully-capable volunteers to serve in our all-volunteer military, and I really don't see why in the world it would be acceptable for gays to serve in the military so long as no one knew they were gay. Do you think it's some sort of mentally-transmitted disease, where merely being aware that Joe's going on a date with Mike this weekend will do harm to heterosexual soldiers? Somehow, whatever risk Joe and Steve's date poses is contained by them never mentioning it to their colleagues and going to a movie theater two towns away?
3. "...but our kids can't openly celebrate Christmas or pray in school." I was quite unaware that there were any laws anywhere in the United States prohibiting children from openly celebrating Christmas (whatever that would even mean - banning Christmas music?) or praying in school. In fact, while public schools themselves cannot lead organized prayer, it's generally considered to be a violation of the Anti-Establishment Clause to forbid students from praying, so long as the prayer is not disruptive. You want to bow your head in homeroom? Go for it. You want to wear a Christmas sweater to school? Go for it. Your school tried to break up group of students who decided on their own to pray before the first bell? I imagine the ACLU would like to hear about it.
4. "As president, I'll end Obama's war on religion." Good grief, I am literally the worst soldier in the US Army, as I had no idea we were even fighting a war on religion! Actually, no one at any of the three Army bases I've been assigned to thus far must have heard, because I've met chaplains - ordained ministers, all of them - at each place! And been in chapels! And been at events where, despite the questionable first-amendment implications, the event is opened with a brief prayer! This war is going even worse than Afghanistan.
5. "And I'll fight against liberal attacks on our religious heritage." You do that. Meanwhile I'll be over here hanging out with our religious heritage, including the Jefferson Bible and some of Dr. Benjamin Franklin's writings, like this:
The Faith you mention has doubtless its use in the World. I do not desire to see it diminished, nor would I endeavour to lessen it in any Man. But I wish it were more productive of good Works, than I have generally seen it: I mean real good Works, Works of Kindness, Charity, Mercy, and Publick Spirit; not Holiday-keeping, Sermon-Reading or Hearing; performing Church Ceremonies, or making long Prayers, filled with Flatteries and Compliments, despis’d even by wise Men, and much less capable of pleasing the Deity. The worship of God is a Duty; the hearing and reading of Sermons may be useful; but, if Men rest in Hearing and Praying, as too many do, it is as if a Tree should Value itself on being water’d and putting forth Leaves, tho’ it never produc’d any Fruit.
6. "Faith made America strong." Sure did! You mean things like "faith in the ability of a small colony to break free from the yoke of a tyrannical regime" and "faith that the democratic process would work" and "faith that, no matter what happened down the line, the Constitution would always be held as the most important document in the nation," right?
7. "It can make her strong again." Attention everybody: According to Gov. Perry, America is no longer strong. The nation which has the second-largest active-duty military force in the world, which has the third-largest population in the world, has the seventh-highest GDP in the world, and has the world's second-largest nuclear arsenal, is no longer strong. Good to know!
Hey, Texans...can you all please do something about your governors? Like keep them from running for president, because that just seems to lead to a heap of incoherent crazy?
Hey, Army: you say it's just a "holiday semi-formal." Attendance is optional but those who go get released early the day of and come in to work late the next day, and those who don't go will work regular hours doing shitty details in the motor pool.
Knowing this I chose not to attend, largely because I don't celebrate Christmas and generally try to avoid giving the appearance that I do. Yes, I go to my cousin's Christmas eve party, and exchange gifts with my family, but in my mind that's a rare chance to see everyone together (ten cousins plus a sister, spread across four different states, none in the same country as me), and the fact that sometimes I can take off from school or work during Hanukkah but other years I cannot.
So here's the thing: I'd buy your story that it's not a Christmas party were it not for a few minor little points:
1. December 8 is awfully early to celebrate New Year's.
2. The graphic on the official invitation card thing shows a Christmas tree and Christmas ornament.
3. I'm quite certain that were I to ask the higher-ups who organized this when Hanukkah starts this year - to say nothing of asking for a brief explanation of what the holiday celebrates, or how it is observed - I would be met with blank stares*.
4. Each company was apparently to put together a little skit, based on a Christmas movie. (Number of Christmas movies I have ever actually sat down and watched from start to finish: one.)
5. If you offer a choice of main dishes at a catered event and one of the choices is pork** then, uh, don't be surprised if the idea that you're somehow including Jews in your Christmas celebration isn't really taken very seriously.
I have no problem with having a Christmas party***. At my last two jobs there were Christmas parties. i chose not to attend. Fine. But if you want to have a Christmas part - have a fucking Christmas party. If you want to have a "Happy everyone's going on leave soon, it's dark and gloomy and German weather sucks, let's go dress up all pretty and eat a nice meal," great - but skip the Christmas theme and the pork.
*Note: this is fine. I'm willing to bet a significant amount of money that neither the commander nor sergeant major of the squadron are Jewish, and I don't expect anyone to know about other people's holidays. HOWEVER, if you don't know, don't claim to be celebrating it.
**I didn't realize until fairly recently that while I don't, nor have I ever come remotely close to truly keeping kosher, there are certain things that somehow absorbed into me. For instance, as far as I know I have never in my life eaten any pork, and even when I was being the worst vegetarian in the world during basic training, the idea of eating pig is kind of horrid.
***It gets a bit..squidgy, ethically-speaking, when we're talking about the military, but I'll let that go for now.
Mr. Gingrich, a few minor points you seem to be unaware of:
1. "Food stamps" are not issued as a cash benefit.
2. "Food stamps" are not issued as a credit card.
3. You cannot use 'food stamps' to purchase anything other than food.
The program once known as food stamps is now known as the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program. Here is how it works: you are eligible to receive SNAP benefits if your income is 130% or less of the national poverty line. When you begin to receive benefits you are given an EBT, or electronic benefits transfer card.
In many senses the EBT card works as a prepaid debit card. An amount of money, calculated based on your income and household size, is deposited on the card every month. You have a PIN. At the grocery store, instead of hitting 'debit' on the PIN pad, you hit 'EBT', type in your pin, and the total is taken out of your account and given to the grocery store.
You cannot use your SNAP EBT card to purchase anything other than SNAP-eligible food, because it is not a credit or debit card. This means that at the grocery store, you cannot use your EBT card to purchase napkins, or diapers, or alcohol, or hot food*. Understand that it's not a "you're not supposed to", it's that you can't. The computer system will not allow it; if your order includes $25.00 of SNAP-eligible food and $10.00 of beer and paper plates, and you pay by EBT, it will say you still owe $10.00.
Please, please, please, let's next do food policing and whether or not other people should be allowed to dictate what someone can buy with their SNAP funds. (Spoiler: no, they shouldn't.)
*I'm not sure why hot food is prohibited - you can buy frozen meals all you want, but no hot rotisserie chickens.
