Cop writes himself ticket.

Wow.

On the one hand: Not so inspiring that a cop is getting "distracted by a truck stopping", especially if he's passing a school bus.

On the other hand? Dude owned up to his mistake, publicly.

I say he comes out on top, for this one.

Once again, the best solution is to get naked.

Neatorama has a kind of cool post on writers that wrote nude, including Agatha Christie, Hemingway, and Benjamin Franklin. I am amused.

Apollonius' nickname may well have been Apple.

I presented today in math class.

I volunteered to present in math class today. Because when I was doing my homework this morning, I worked through I.42, and said, "Holy crap, I completely understand this!"

Naturally, I missed an initial step at the beginning which threw me off, and it was not a particularly good presentation. But my tutor - from our brief conversation after class - seemed unconcerned about the quality of presentation compared to my understanding of the material. That's something of a weight off, because I'm not great at presenting.

But I volunteered. I'm trying to remember when I last did that; I think it was sometime first semester of my freshman year, and then only once. I was nervous, as always, even as I asked my tutor if I could do that particular prop. But despite being nervous, I asked. Fairly certain I wouldn't have done that last year.

I guess that says something. I'm not going to spend a whole lot of time worrying about it, though. I'd rather just bask in knowing that I did it, and I probably wouldn't have last year.

Sorry, man, but...

You're never going to win so much as a the nomination with a name like 'Huckabee'.

Sometimes life's unfair.

Funny of the day

Quote of the day, via the BBC Magazine:

A bit 'gangsta'.

Okay, so it's said by...a "royal aide", commenting on the car that prince Charles used to cruise around the US while here.

I'm getting the uncontrollable giggles just thinking about the source of that quote. I haven't the slightest doubt that anyone who could possibly described as a "royal aide" is the whitest person in the world, who wouldn't know 'gangsta' if it shot them in the head, and who no doubt speaks with an impeccably posh accent.

Oh, Britain. How I love you and your silly, silly, archaic monarchy.

I am joyful

FedEx delivered my printer! The truck didn't crash again! They didn't break it! It works! I can print without needing to go to the computer lab now!

An airline does the right thing, for once

Say you're on a plane. The flight's running a couple minutes late but not too much. People are already seated; you're about ready to push off from the gate.

Then the screaming starts. And there's a toddler, some little sticky-handed, snotty-nosed brat of a thing, screaming and crying and running around and being all in all a pox upon society.

The flight attendants do their job: "Sir, ma'am, if you can't control your child and make her sit down in her own seat, you'll have to leave the plane."

The parents decline to do so. "Can I hold her in my lap?" Yuppie Soccer Mom asks.

"I'm sorry, she needs to be belted into her own seat for takeoff," the attendant replies.

The couple + brat were escorted off the plane. They got home the next day; they were refunded the entire cost of all three tickets, and offered three tickets, to and from anyplace AirTran flies.

Good job, Airtran. Now we just need to start charging people traveling with children extra - an 'inconvenience' fee, so to speak, because you know the kid is going to be loud and obnoxious - and we'll be golden.

State of the Union: Completely borked.

For the sake of A) getting homework done and B) my blood pressure, I did not watch the SotU last night. That really just means I'll spend even more time poring over the transcript. Here goes. Things that really bug me will be in italics.

Some in this chamber are new to the House and the Senate -- and I congratulate the Democrat majority. (Applause.) Congress has changed, but not our responsibilities. Each of us is guided by our own convictions -- and to these we must stay faithful. Yet we're all held to the same standards, and called to serve the same good purposes: To extend this nation's prosperity; to spend the people's money wisely; to solve problems, not leave them to future generations; to guard America against all evil; and to keep faith with those we have sent forth to defend us.

Sorry, but...no. Congress is not their to guard my country against evil. Guardianship against evil is between a person and their god/higher power/giant teapot/spaghetti monster/whatever the hell else. Not between their congressional representative and said person. I vote for people based on their policies, not on their opinion on good and evil.

I don't even know what that last clause means. Keep faith with those we've sent to defend us? Presumably, this means...wait...oh, god, I get it now. "Support our troops" is now a congressional priority. *sigh*

We're not the first to come here with a government divided and uncertainty in the air. Like many before us, we can work through our differences, and achieve big things for the American people. Our citizens don't much care which side of the aisle we sit on -- as long as we're willing to cross that aisle when there is work to be done. (Applause.) Our job is to make life better for our fellow Americans, and to help them to build a future of hope and opportunity -- and this is the business before us tonight.

First sentence: No shit, sherlock. America didn't invent partisan government. Second sentence: probably a bit optimistic, but OK, I'll roll with it. Third sentence: No, that is entirely untrue, and stop speaking for me, Mr. Bush. I do care which side of the aisle someone's on. I don't like to vote by party but I usually do, as my views are without a doubt on the far left side. I disagree pretty solidly with most people on the right side of the aisle. On some issues I'd rather nothing happen than some half-assed "bipartisan" bill getting signed off on.

A future of hope and opportunity begins with a growing economy -- and that is what we have. We're now in the 41st month of uninterrupted job growth, in a recovery that has created 7.2 million new jobs -- so far. Unemployment is low, inflation is low, and wages are rising. This economy is on the move, and our job is to keep it that way, not with more government, but with more enterprise. (Applause.)

So how does the government keep the economy growing without governmental meddling? Oh, right - just subcontract the work out to huge corporations. Which many high-ranking government officials are or were major shareholders of.

First, we must balance the federal budget. (Applause.) We can do so without raising taxes. (Applause.) What we need to do is impose spending discipline in Washington, D.C. We set a goal of cutting the deficit in half by 2009, and met that goal three years ahead of schedule. (Applause.) Now let us take the next step. In the coming weeks, I will submit a budget that eliminates the federal deficit within the next five years. (Applause.) I ask you to make the same commitment. Together, we can restrain the spending appetite of the federal government, and we can balance the federal budget. (Applause.)

1) If you want to balance the budget you have to either raise taxes or cut spending, or both. We don't want to raise taxes? That means we're going to need to cut spending, as Mr. Bush clearly understands.
2) The two biggest money-gobblers are Social Security and (surprise!) the Department of Defense. This is deceptive because the actual budget for the DoD generally doesn't include things like...uh, the two current wars that we're involved in.
3) Here's a theory: Stop paying money to people for quitting work (Social Security) and stop paying for idiots to run around with guns and to research cutting-edge planes or what have you that we will never use.

Next, there is the matter of earmarks. These special interest items are often slipped into bills at the last hour -- when not even C-SPAN is watching. (Laughter.) In 2005 alone, the number of earmarks grew to over 13,000 and totaled nearly $18 billion. Even worse, over 90 percent of earmarks never make it to the floor of the House and Senate -- they are dropped into committee reports that are not even part of the bill that arrives on my desk. You didn't vote them into law. I didn't sign them into law. Yet, they're treated as if they have the force of law. The time has come to end this practice. So let us work together to reform the budget process, expose every earmark to the light of day and to a vote in Congress, and cut the number and cost of earmarks at least in half by the end of this session.

Actually not that much to say here. For the most part I do agree. Government spending should be completely transparent (see above re: DoD).

And, finally, to keep this economy strong we must take on the challenge of entitlements. Social Security and Medicare and Medicaid are commitments of conscience, and so it is our duty to keep them permanently sound. Yet, we're failing in that duty. And this failure will one day leave our children with three bad options: huge tax increases, huge deficits, or huge and immediate cuts in benefits. Everyone in this chamber knows this to be true -- yet somehow we have not found it in ourselves to act. So let us work together and do it now. With enough good sense and goodwill, you and I can fix Medicare and Medicaid -- and save Social Security.

Okay. Medicare and Medicaid - yes. Well, if I had my absolute say I'd say trash them and replace the entire system with a nationalized system like in Britain or Canada or, you know, every other civilized nation. Our country has some of the best doctors, best researchers, etc. We have the highest standard of living in the world, and it's disgusting that there are people who can't afford medical treatment.

But I'm not entirely sold on Social Security. If you're disabled and can't work? Yes, as an American citizen I feel you're entitled to certain assistance. But if you're just...65, and decide you don't want to work anymore? Well, that's a choice, so why should the government pay for you to sit around and eat bonbons all day? Chances are you're collecting from some sort of private pension or retirement fund. And likely, I'm never going to see a cent of that deduction out of my paycheck. I'm not convinced that fixing Social Security should be a priority; I think it ought to be scrapped and replaced with something that actually makes sense.

Spreading opportunity and hope in America also requires public schools that give children the knowledge and character they need in life. Five years ago, we rose above partisan differences to pass the No Child Left Behind Act, preserving local control, raising standards, and holding those schools accountable for results. And because we acted, students are performing better in reading and math, and minority students are closing the achievement gap.

*twitch* No! No no no no no no no no. NCLB is horrible. It punishes already underachieving districts and schools. It hurts the teachers who are brave enough to take on the worst students, it in no way preserves local control, and it takes money away when schools do poorly on tests. That is, if a school's standardized test scores don't meet certain levels, that school loses funding. Which, obviously, will make the scores shoot up. I personally believe that the NCLB act is one of the worst things to happen to public education in a very long time.

Now the task is to build on the success, without watering down standards, without taking control from local communities, and without backsliding and calling it reform. We can lift student achievement even higher by giving local leaders flexibility to turn around failing schools, and by giving families with children stuck in failing schools the right to choose someplace better. (Applause.) We must increase funds for students who struggle -- and make sure these children get the special help they need. (Applause.) And we can make sure our children are prepared for the jobs of the future and our country is more competitive by strengthening math and science skills. The No Child Left Behind Act has worked for America's children -- and I ask Congress to reauthorize this good law. (Applause.)

Again: NO. Just - no! He's talking about vouchers and you know it, and it's disgusting. Decent student in bad school + vouchers = decent students leave bad schools; public schools get worse. We're not doing anything good for any students with vouchers! We need to improve our public schools, not abandon them. That's a white flag. It says "yep, these schools suck, I give up," and that is not acceptable. It's absolutely horrifying that people even consider that as an option. We need to just start pouring money into our schools. Teachers should not need to buy basic supplies out-of-pocket. Schools should be big, and clean, and safe, and high-tech.

Furthermore: Yeah, math and science. They're important. I certainly believe that - I don't particularly like math or some sciences, but I took four years of each in high school, and go to a college that require four years of math and three of science. But what about the other subjects? What about literature? No, forget that - what about basic grammar and spelling? Music? History? Geography? Our schools are filled with students who can't point to their own state on a map of this country, or explain the difference between they're and their, and don't know who Beethoven was. We need to meet international challenges in all areas, not just the maths and sciences.

A future of hope and opportunity requires that all our citizens have affordable and available health care. (Applause.) When it comes to health care, government has an obligation to care for the elderly, the disabled, and poor children. And we will meet those responsibilities. For all other Americans, private health insurance is the best way to meet their needs. (Applause.) But many Americans cannot afford a health insurance policy.

See above re: socialized health care. We have people living in the richest, most educated country in the world that can't afford a visit with a doctor.

And so tonight, I propose two new initiatives to help more Americans afford their own insurance. First, I propose a standard tax deduction for health insurance that will be like the standard tax deduction for dependents. Families with health insurance will pay no income on payroll tax -- or payroll taxes on $15,000 of their income. Single Americans with health insurance will pay no income or payroll taxes on $7,500 of their income. With this reform, more than 100 million men, women, and children who are now covered by employer-provided insurance will benefit from lower tax bills. At the same time, this reform will level the playing field for those who do not get health insurance through their job. For Americans who now purchase health insurance on their own, this proposal would mean a substantial tax savings -- $4,500 for a family of four making $60,000 a year. And for the millions of other Americans who have no health insurance at all, this deduction would help put a basic private health insurance plan within their reach. Changing the tax code is a vital and necessary step to making health care affordable for more Americans.

I...what the hell? People who have health insurance through their work will pay less tax, while people who need to pay for it on their own will pay comparatively greater taxes? What the hell is this? How does this - even if I'm completely misinterpreting it - how does altering the tax code fix health care?

My second proposal is to help the states that are coming up with innovative ways to cover the uninsured. States that make basic private health insurance available to all their citizens should receive federal funds to help them provide this coverage to the poor and the sick. I have asked the Secretary of Health and Human Services to work with Congress to take existing federal funds and use them to create "Affordable Choices" grants. These grants would give our nation's governors more money and more flexibility to get private health insurance to those most in need.

Well, that's a novel approach. But why not just nationalize health insurance so that everyone has it???

There are many other ways that Congress can help. We need to expand Health Savings Accounts. (Applause.) We need to help small businesses through Association Health Plans. (Applause.) We need to reduce costs and medical errors with better information technology. (Applause.) We will encourage price transparency. And to protect good doctors from junk lawsuits, we passing medical liability reform. (Applause.) In all we do, we must remember that the best health care decisions are made not by government and insurance companies, but by patients and their doctors. (Applause.)

Or, we could nationalize health insurance, stop allowing the health care industry (doctors, insurance agencies, pharmaceutical companies) to be such bastions of pure evil, and nationalize health care.

Extending hope and opportunity in our country requires an immigration system worthy of America -- with laws that are fair and borders that are secure. When laws and borders are routinely violated, this harms the interests of our country. To secure our border, we're doubling the size of the Border Patrol, and funding new infrastructure and technology.

Yet even with all these steps, we cannot fully secure the border unless we take pressure off the border -- and that requires a temporary worker program. We should establish a legal and orderly path for foreign workers to enter our country to work on a temporary basis. As a result, they won't have to try to sneak in, and that will leave Border Agents free to chase down drug smugglers and criminals and terrorists. (Applause.) We'll enforce our immigration laws at the work site and give employers the tools to verify the legal status of their workers, so there's no excuse left for violating the law. (Applause.)

God, yes. Those Mexicans picking fruit out in California are really destroying the country. And I hate how often terrorists come in over the Mexican border, because - wait...has that, like, ever happened?

We need to uphold the great tradition of the melting pot that welcomes and assimilates new arrivals. (Applause.) We need to resolve the status of the illegal immigrants who are already in our country without animosity and without amnesty. (Applause.) Convictions run deep in this Capitol when it comes to immigration. Let us have a serious, civil, and conclusive debate, so that you can pass, and I can sign, comprehensive immigration reform into law. (Applause.)

Why is amnesty a bad thing? For someone who's so fervently Christian that's a pretty ballsy goal.

Extending hope and opportunity depends on a stable supply of energy that keeps America's economy running and America's environment clean. For too long our nation has been dependent on foreign oil. And this dependence leaves us more vulnerable to hostile regimes, and to terrorists -- who could cause huge disruptions of oil shipments, and raise the price of oil, and do great harm to our economy.

Remove 'foreign' from that sentence and I agree, wholeheartedly.

It's in our vital interest to diversify America's energy supply -- the way forward is through technology. We must continue changing the way America generates electric power, by even greater use of clean coal technology, solar and wind energy, and clean, safe nuclear power. (Applause.) We need to press on with battery research for plug-in and hybrid vehicles, and expand the use of clean diesel vehicles and biodiesel fuel. (Applause.) We must continue investing in new methods of producing ethanol -- (applause) -- using everything from wood chips to grasses, to agricultural wastes.

We made a lot of progress, thanks to good policies here in Washington and the strong response of the market. And now even more dramatic advances are within reach. Tonight, I ask Congress to join me in pursuing a great goal. Let us build on the work we've done and reduce gasoline usage in the United States by 20 percent in the next 10 years. (Applause.) When we do that we will have cut our total imports by the equivalent of three-quarters of all the oil we now import from the Middle East.

To reach this goal, we must increase the supply of alternative fuels, by setting a mandatory fuels standard to require 35 billion gallons of renewable and alternative fuels in 2017 -- and that is nearly five times the current target. (Applause.) At the same time, we need to reform and modernize fuel economy standards for cars the way we did for light trucks -- and conserve up to 8.5 billion more gallons of gasoline by 2017.

Achieving these ambitious goals will dramatically reduce our dependence on foreign oil, but it's not going to eliminate it. And so as we continue to diversify our fuel supply, we must step up domestic oil production in environmentally sensitive ways. (Applause.) And to further protect America against severe disruptions to our oil supply, I ask Congress to double the current capacity of the Strategic Petroleum Reserve. (Applause.)

Know what else we could do? Drive less and in smaller cars, and use less electricity. Actually, I bet that would be a whole lot easier.


We will now take a brief intermission so that I can do some studying. More later.

Gruntle, gruntle

(Gruntle: a very old way of saying grumble)

A week ago (15 Jan) I ordered a printer from CircuitCity.com. Why? Because I'm in need of a printer, and while it might be pretty bad at doing both, a printer/scanner for $40 with free shipping is a fairly delectable deal. So, I order it. I get the confirmation email. I get an email telling me that it has shipped, via FedEx.

I'm addicted to tracking packages online. If I order something online or ship something somewhere, I must have a tracking number. I like to mentally map out a parcel's journey, as it makes its way from A to B. Plus, it lets me be sure that whoever I'm paying is doing their job, and my box is not sitting in a warehouse for two weeks.

According to FedEx, my package began its journey from San Leandro, CA, on the 16th, a day after I ordered it. Great, I think - it should be here by the end of the week.

Jan 19, 2007

1:05 PM

Delivery exception

SANTA FE, NM

Local weather delay, delivery attempted

Sorry? It's 40 degrees and mostly sunny, but - okay, fine. The delivery driver decided maybe to kick off his weekend a bit early. I've slacked on the job before, and it sucks for your customers, but fine. I'm not going to get all high-and-mighty over it. It'll be here Monday.

Guess what wasn't in the mail room yesterday? Thats right, my printer.

I planned on calling them yesterday, but didn't get the chance to, mostly as I mistakenly thought that I had to compose a minuet for this morning. I did call today (Hint: when calling FedEx Ground customer service, hit '0' once to get a real person. Say 'no' when they ask if you're calling about shipping. You'll get a human!). The woman said that they'd start a trace (take the blue pill!), and call me back.

Ten bucks says that they can't find it, in which case I bet anything that my printer is hanging out wherever the hell my tube of posters went last year (the Bermuda Triangle? I dunno.) when FedEx lost that. It's a conspiracy, I say.

You cannot opt out of equal rights, jackass!

*twitch* The Catholic Church (of course) is considering closing adoption agencies in Britain rather than comply with a policy of non-discrimination.

Listen, dipwads: You work for an adoption agency. That means that your first priority is the well-being of children. Nothing else comes first. You don't have two equal priorities. Complying with idiotic, bigotry posing as religious dogma does not come remotely close.

Can we please do something about the Catholic church? Their idiotic little modern-day crusades (condoms in Africa? Hell no! Equal rights for all people? Don't be ridiculous!) are probably as harmful to society as any terrorist actions are; possibly more so in the long term (ie, condoms in Africa, which of course is in no way A) overpopulated and B) being devastated by a mostly-preventable STD).

So. My good mood this morning lasted for all of the half hour it took me to shower and get dressed...

Sunny Santa Fe!

Now with a bit less sun. But it's an awfully pretty place. (And right now awfully snowy.)

Oh, Eire...

Oh, Wikipedia:

Observed up to the early 19th century, and called Whipping The Herring, it involved a local butcher parading through the streets to the Lee while flogging a herring with a whip. Followed by local people, once at the river he would drop the herring into the water, and, picking up leg of lamb adorned with ribbons, he would then parade back to his shop. There he would distribute cuts of the meat to the joyous spectators

What? The questions this raises are many. Am I a bad person for giggling uncontrollably at the phrase "whipping the herring"? Why had I not heard of this before? Is this just some fool putting random stuff on Wikipedia?

Soft math...

According to the London Metropolitan Police, there were 168 murders in all the boroughs of London in the fiscal year of 2005-6.

According to the Philadelphia Police Department, there were 377 murders in the city of Philadelphia in 2005.

You may note that 277 is approximately 2.24 times greater than 168.

The population of Philadelphia in 2005 was about 1,463,281. The population of London in 2005 was about 7.5 million.

7.5 million is about 5.12 times greater than 1,463,281.

This math does not add up.

And thus it begins...

Hillary Clinton is going to run. Not that there was much doubt before, but still, one could dream.

Can someone please explain to her and John Kerry that they are not doing their party any favors?

Lincoln, the Constitution, and whether or not he was the worst thing to happen to America, ever.

Since a fateful project in 10th grade I have personally maintained that Abraham Lincoln was A) a tyrannical despot who B) set an extremely dangerous precedent for American government. He was not the first nor last to dance around the Constitution. He was the first to do so in the name of "national security".

A few points that solidified themselves in my mind tonight:
1. Americans are all bound by the Constitution. It's not a protection of rights for the people, nor simply a listing of rules for the Government. It's both, and with very few exceptions, is extremely clear. Congress has these rights but these limits. The Executive can do this but not that, and the Judicial is allowed to do this, but not these other things. The People are protected by these laws, but under these circumstances, lose certain protections.
2. As the World Superpower, America ought to strive to set an example. This means, in my mind, that the rights and protections set forth in the Constitution apply to everyone, regardless of their citizenship. The American government isn't prohibited from passing laws abridging Americans' freedom of speech: They shall make no law abridging freedom of speech.
3. The Constitution is not a dead document. It's the framework for a living, breathing, changing nation. This means that sometimes it needs to be changed (ie, protecting the rights of various groups to vote). It should not be considered entirely rigid, but all the same: The "spirit" of it is fairly obvious. Some things are not in that spirit and therefore should not be backed up using the Constitution.

Looking for someone...

Here's something interesting: Find Satoshi.

The premise is fairly simple: Using the internet, find this guy Satoshi. He's not hiding, just not actively looking to be found.

An interesting experiment in internet usage, IMO.

An open letter

Dear FedEx:

According to weather.com it is currently 32 degrees and cloudy. According to weatherunderground.com it is 32 degrees and clear. According to my personal experience it is a bit warmer and, in fact, partly sunny.

So why, dearest Federal Express, does your online tracking service say that your driver attempted to deliver my new printer, but failed due to a "local weather delay"? Excessively moderate weather? Overwhelming briskness? A distinct lack of precipitation? Do your trucks best function when the roads are, true to Santa Fe style, snowed-upon, unplowed, and refrozen into one continuous grid of ice? Is it perhaps the Winter Storm watch, which reads, in part,

A Winter Storm Watch remains in effect from 5 PM MST this
afternoon through Saturday afternoon.

Snow will move north into northern New Mexico by this evening and
be heavy at times through Saturday. In addition... winds will increase
over the northern mountains and northeast New Mexico Saturday
afternoon and create areas of blowing and drifting snow.

or something else altogether?

I eagerly await your answer.

Kind regards,
A curious customer

The problem with religion

It all builds on each other. You can't read and understand Aquinas if you don't properly recall Augustine. Or, for that matter, the bible.

I remember Job, quite well, owing to my approaching a seminar essay last year in the worst possible way ("This semester I shall explain the book of Job."), but that's just about it.

So this weekend, I shall be hunkered down in my room and/or the library, spending some quality time with Jesus and probably Augustine.

Also: Anselm was crazy. Even Aquinas thought so. And why do so many of the Christian theologians' names start with A?

A theory about Apollonius and genitals

It would be in very poor taste for me to so much as imply that, as cones could be construed as vaguely phallic, one Apollonius of Perga may perhaps have been compensating for something.

Very, very poor taste, so I won't. No matter how much prop 32 bugs me (even the second time around).

Cool thing of the day

Tracking a UPS package?

Just copy/paste the tracking number into your Google search bar. It'll give you a link that'll take you directly to the tracking page.

(Just discovered this by accident. And, in case you're wondering, my minifridge is now somewhere between Commerce City, Colorado, and Santa Fe.)

Barring freedom of speech in Europe

Full circle, much? Chill out, Germany.

Yes, the Nazis weren't real nice people, what with the totalitarianism and genocide and ill-fated attempts at world conquest. I'm firmly on the side of Nazi = Bad.

But something being bad doesn't mean that people should outlaw the mention of it. One of the consequences of the good guys winning WWII is that you still have the right to call yourself a Nazi. The right to commit genocide? No, sorry, we'll be stopping you. But one of the ways that the Nazi party came into power was by stifling free expression, outlawing certain opinions, and tossing people in jail for voicing unpopular sentiments. We (and by we I mean "the allied powers", not America) stopped them, at a huge cost in lives. If we were the good guys and we fought that war for justice and equality and puppies and such, then we have to tolerate the inevitable outcome.

Another commission official said that Sweden, for example, whose constitution guarantees absolute freedom of speech, could be granted an opt-out if the EU-wide criminalisation was agreed.

Right. Freedom of speech should be the default, not a special fine-print situation.

It's cold.

According to weather.com, it is currently 10 degrees in Santa Fe and feels like it's -1. It's going down to 1 degree tonight.

May I say: oh god it's COLD.

Mmm

Is there any food that cannot be turned into a wondefully tasty treat with just a bit of Nutella?

Back up high

I managed to have a relatively uneventful flight. Relatively, for me, means "I was not stuck in Cincinnati for five hours, and I arrived at my destination when I was supposed to."

There was an aborted landing going into Chicago. One of those times where, okay, we're descending, things on the ground are now houses and cars and whatnot rather than indistinguishable specks, going lower, oh my we're going up rather alarmingly fast, why might that be? Apparently there was a problem with the runway or we were supposed to use a different one or something, and a few minutes later we landed without problem (a bit abruptly, but word on the street has it that Midway has very short runways). But to someone who's rather nervous flying to begin with, the "going down, going down, all's normal, oh god not normal" is really scary.

And this is the second time in about a year that it's happened to me.

My father, who's flown probably ten flights for every one I've been on, doesn't think he's ever been on a flight that aborted a landing. My mother has never experienced it. Twice now in a year for me. *sigh*

I also met a very nice Southwest ticket agent in Philadelphia, because stupid me forgot to remove my pocketknife from my purse before going through security. If it were anything else I'd have just handed it over, but this particular knife was inherited from my grandfather when I was about six, so it has significant sentimental value. But the Very Nice Woman actually went back, found one of my checked bags, and put it in there for me. So for once, I got a positive story from flying.

And after having hauled three big, bulky suitcases all the way up to my dorm, I'm once again left wondering who the hell builds a city at such a high altitude? Yes it's beautiful, but you know what? There's no oxygen here.

I swear, last thing then I'll let it go.

Want some crap confiscated by the TSA? Check eBay.

Okay, I really *should* just go to bed now...

I can't tear myself away from the TSA's website.

On June 23, 2005, the Department of Transportation (DOT) granted the Zippo Manufacturing Co an emergency exemption that allows passengers to pack up to 2 fueled Zippo lighters in checked luggage. The lighter must be in DOT-approved packaging. The packaging is a vapor-tight plastic box that can accommodate a single Zippo lighter. These packages must be clearly marked by their manufacturer to show that they comply with the DOT regulations. This enables TSA security officers to easily identify them during screening.

*blink* America's Security: sponsored by Zippo.

You may not bring matches in your checked baggage because of safety regulations. You may, however, bring up to four books of safety (non-strike anywhere) matches in your carry-on baggage or on your person.

You can't check matches. Okay, fine - you don't want highly flammable things in the cargo hold. A bit touchy, I think, but logical. You can't bring lighters as checked baggage or carry-ons for the same reason. But you can bring four books of matches in your carry-on, because it's not like anyone ever tried to use matches to set off a bomb in a plane.

Yeah. Because if we use logic, the terrorists win.

Fascinatingly, hammers, drills and drill bits are prohibited, but "tools (seven inches or less in length)" are permitted, as are "wrenches and pliers (seven inches or less in length)".

Personally my biggest worry about flying these days is the snow-globe problem.

Thank god for the TSA

The Transportation Security Administration: Keeping America safe from the snow-globe menace since 2001.

Also interesting:

Bringing a prohibited item to a security checkpoint - even accidentally - is illegal.

So...you show up for a flight. You have, say, a 3.5 ounce bottle of mouthwash with you. They notice. You say, "Oh. Whoops. Just go ahead and throw that out." They say, "You're under arrest for possesion of more than 3 ounces of a liquid at a security checkpoint in an airport." The Bill of Rights shrivels up and dies, as it needs more than 3 liquid ounces of justice to preserve it.

Further:

To ensure everyone's security, a security officer may decide that an item that is not on this chart is potentially dangerous and may prevent you from taking it through the checkpoint.

What the hell? We now give our police - oh, wait, they're not even trained in law enforcement - the right to randomly declare something "dangerous", and confiscate it? What the ever-loving hell are we doing to ourselves?

For what it's worth, I'm half tempted to set up a kiosk in the departures lobby of PHL. I'll sell 3-ounce bottles of water and clear plastic bags. This list is pretty chuckle-worthy, and it says something about the idiocy of the system that they have to break it down into whether or not you can bring pudding vs whether or not you can bring Jello. Your tax money at work, ladies and gents.

...Anyone want to place any bets as to whether or not I actually manage to get on an airplane on Friday? Extra screening, perhaps?

Odd...

So I think at some point during the switch to Google-powered Blogger, either Blogger or Facebook borked up the import option and stopped seeing my blog. Odd.

Odder: It took me until now to notice.

Also there's no way in hell I'm going to be both fully packed *and* calm by tomorrow night.

British vs American newspapers

Reasons why British papers are better:

1. Free stuff in the papers. Most of it posing as educational, but if you want to plunk a few coins down on a paper, you're likely to get some manner of DVD or magazine or poster or wallchart or god-knows-what-else.
   
2. Comedy answer: The Sun.
   
3. Comedy answer: Page 3 girls. Serious implication of comedy answer: The idea that nudity is not an abomination.

Reasons why American papers are better:

1. The New York Times, Washington Post, Philadelphia Inquirer, and LA Times.
2. Less celebrity crap, more news.
3. Broadsheet format is the norm, and I personally prefer that.
   

Cool thing of the whenever-the-hell-I-feel-like-updating

I'm not entirely sure what's going on here, but it apparently involves a crapload of electricity not behaving properly.

How to be unhelpful

I flipped past past a news show this evening trying to find "Jeopardy" - I think it was 20/20 or something like that. They were talking about Princess Diana and her son's girlfriend, and how she must be protected from the media and she hates the media and so forth. It was like watching a car accident or something, where it's horrifying but you just can't look away: they kept talking over footage of strung-together paparazzi photos about how horribly invasive the press is. Uh, guys? You're really not helping.

Somalia

The US has attacked Somalia based on "credible intelligence".

We also attacked Iraq based on "credible intelligence". And Afghanistan. And, for that matter, Vietnam.

Some other military exploits that actually ended a bit better for the US were based not on "credible intelligence" but "actual threats to the world" (ie, both World Wars), or meaningful ideals such as "the betterment of mankind" and "forming a more perfect nation" (ie, the Revolution, the Civil War).

Also, the Pentagon won't say if our wonderful military fighter pilots, who fly by day bombing the shit out of poverty-stricken African villages, and spend their night no doubt in luxurious hotels in Saudi Arabia or wherever, actually hit what they were supposed to. Hopefully there were no Canadians in the way and the pilots weren't hopped up on speed.

This is unacceptable

Could someone please explain to me why I appear to be suffering from standard hay-fever style allergies in January? January is cold and flu season. Not "ah goddam pollen" season. I mean, really - 60 , 70 degrees in January is nice, but on the other hand...argh.

*snuffle*

Just so you know:

From today's Courier Post (a charming little paper with extraordinarily little journalistic merit):

Is the so-called globalization concept truly the path to one-world government? If so, how will it be accomplished? Which organizations will be involved? Will it be the Republican or Democratic Party that will be the proponent of this one-world rule? Can history enlighten us? Yes.

Er, okay? We continue with a few choice excerpts:

Is it fact or fiction that, nationally, we are controlled by a group of elected elitists? And was there a conspiracy on the part of more than 125 members of Congress in 1976 to completely change the monetary systems and processes of production in America to regulation by international authorities? They did, and with impunity.

And as if that weren't bad enough...

Nationally, we are controlled by a group of elected politicians who are members of the Council on Foreign Relations and the Trilateral Commission who hold interlocking positions in the media, financial systems, unions and academia. Every president since Woodrow Wilson up to and including President Clinton, except Ronald Reagan, has been a member of both groups. President George H.W. Bush resigned from both the council and the Trilateral Commission before being elected. President Bush is a member of the secret Skull and Bones fraternity.

Secret Societies ahoy! And you know what? They're chock-full of FREEMASONS! These people want to *gasp* loan some money to the UN so they can renovate their NY headquarters. Why?

Why does the United Nations want American taxes and money for expanding its office building. Only to bring forth an all-consuming and stifled one-world government. This has been partially accomplished by the Third United Nations Conference on the Law of the Sea, adopted on April 30, 1982 and opened for signatures during December 1982.

Obviously. And if that weren't enough proof of this One-World Government menace, how about this?

I asked Jim Florio at a public meeting why the former governor and congressman signed the declaration and to what international authority he wanted to surrender America's sovereignty. Florio responded that the declaration was a bilateral agreement. It was a stupid response.

Huh? Huh? What now, Mr. Florio? For the record, the seem to have lost their PDF download of the document in question, but the organization behind this traitorous document can be found here. Clearly, nothing but evil.

Who wrote this journalistic gem? Well, aside from the obvious answer (someone demented):

The writer was a member of the U.S. Marine Corps in World War II and is a resident of Stratford.

Methinks Grampa's off his PTSD meds again.

Comments

Do people just sit around doing random searches on random topics, find a blog talking about something, and leave a comment - neglecting to notice that the particular post is, say, three months old?

The Internets, the baffle me.

Want: Yoda backpack

Yoda! In backpack form!

Right now, I know it would be immensely irresponsible of me to spend $37.50 + shipping on this.

But I want it so bad.

Newsflash: Airlines suck.

NYTimes article about the rise of "elite" airline passengers - eg, people with enough cash to pay for things such as "customer service".

There are even discussions about whether to begin charging passengers for checking in luggage or advance seat assignments; card-carrying elites would most likely be exempt from those fees.

...yeah. That's clear evidence that the airlines fully understand that they have a monopoly on travel - if you want to ever go anywhere other than "home", you're going to fly, and they will exploit that shamelessly.

Cool thing of the day

SAME cafe, in Denver. You go, you eat, and you pay what you can and what you think your meal was worth.

A promise I hope to be able to keep

I told the housing guy at school that if he finds me on-campus housing before I fly back out there, I swear I will not bother him in any way again before I go back.

Honestly I think that might help motivate him, as, since the beginning of December, I've emailed him about six times and called probably twice that.

"I love America more than you!"

Today's latest idiotic one-upmanship comes from Keith Ellison, the newly-elected congrescritter who happens to be Muslim. Therefore, he unsurprisingly intends to swear his oath of office on a koran, rather than a bible.

Makes sense, yeah?

Equally unsurprisingly some people are being stupid about it, chanting about "American values" and all that crap.

So Ellison's reaction to the criticism? He managed to get permission to use a koran that once belonged to Thomas frikken Jefferson.

Erosion of American values, indeed...